Man Posts Ad Seeking “Two Beautiful Women” to Never Leave His Side at Coachella

An “electronic music producer,” with artist passes for Coachella is looking for “two beautiful women” go with him, and follow his rules.

 

He swears he’s “not some creepy dude that’s going to lurch on you.”  and says; “I am not interested in any romantic encounters with you, I promise”. He’s got passes for the festival that he got from “a high level industry friend,” and the two women he chooses have to promise never leave his side for the entire festival.

 

Here’s his post:

 

Hello,

I’m a electronic music producer and have been working on making connections in the industry as I get set to release my first music. I hate to sound like a douchebag but my brand of music is going to change mainstream electronic music forever. The Coachella 2018 lineup just dropped and if you thought you’d never be able to do it all access, this is the offer for you!

Through a high level industry friend, I’ve obtained access to artist passes for Coachella and am looking for two beautiful women to accompany me to the festival. While I will be there to take in a lot of the shows, I’m also going to be there to network with people in the industry. I don’t know how else to say this, but I’m socially awkward and think that having two gorgeous women with me to help break the ice with some of these people will make it easier for me.

 

Some rules:

1) You must have some interest and knowledge of the electronic music space. Don’t apply if you like Diplo. In fact if you see Diplo, I’d ask that you treat him like a tool.

2) Be between the age of 21-24.

 

3) Please send photos of you and your friend to this e-mail address. I am not interested in any romantic encounters with you, I promise. I’m not some creepy dude that’s going to lurch on you, in fact you and your friend can share a room in the hotel I book mine at. I will have my two best male friends make a decision on who the best candidates are. I trust their judgment because of the amount of deep V-necks they possess, and they live in Santa Monica. Photos must be recent.

 

4) You must be willing to accompany me for the duration of the festival. At some points, there might be some bummers where you don’t get to see acts that you were really excited about. I will try my best to at least let you see your favorites. I myself will be watching a lot of the acts on the festival. These are who I am most excited for: Beyonce, ODESZA, Miguel, Illenium, Jamie Jones, Alison Wonderland, REZZ, Deorro, Soulwax, Jean-Michel Jarre, Alan Walker, Maceo Plex, and X Japan.

5) I will send you one of the demos of a song I’m releasing this year. I want you to give me your thoughts in a one-paragraph review of the track. Even if somehow you think it sucks (I promise it won’t), I want you to be able to talk about my music when we’re around industry people. It probably will sound better coming from two beautiful women than from one socially awkward dude.

 

6) If you get invited to any afterparties, you must insist to those offering the invites that I come with you.

 

7) I smoke a lot of weed, you need to be OK with that.

 

Look forward to hearing from you!

 

 

 

….Gross.

Just buy a ticket ladies.

 

 

Read more here.

 

 

 

 

 

(Photo:  Philip Cosores)

Posted in All News, Lindsay, The Feed

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